I’m not saying anything controversial when I say men love seeing women naked. It’s a fact of life as fundamental as gravity. It’s a force of nature that cannot be stopped by beast, man, or God. It’s an eternal truth and a divine mandate. As sure as the sun will rise, men will attempt to view as many women naked as they possibly can. Any man not doing so is either a sad or a gay one.
This means that any woman a man sees regularly is mentally stripped down during every interaction. If any women are reading this article for some god-forsaken reason, I want you to know that every man at work pictures you naked every day, even if you are ugly. We can’t help it – our minds are endlessly curious about the nude female form. Then again, our species depends on it.
Anywhere men and women are together in the same room, dirty thoughts follow. It doesn’t matter if it’s a church or a strip club. The male brain can even adjust sexiness to help us fuck ugly bitches if that’s all that’s available.
There’s a term known as boat goggles among Navy brats and fishermen. When a bunch of men and women are trapped together on a small boat, tons of fucking happens. At the end of a three-month journey, there isn’t a single surface on that boat that hasn’t been blasted with cum. You could put the hottest models on a boat with the ugliest old dudes, and someone is still getting fucked. What happens on the ship stays on the ship.
Maybe that helps to explain the recent popularity of incest. I suppose it’s not recent, considering people have been fucking relatives for one reason or another for thousands of years. It was foolish of me to think that modern man had grown out of such activities.
As I think of it, though, isn’t the family unit kind of like a boat. You see these motherfuckers day in and day out. Perhaps that makes people with weak minds want to dick down their sister. It certainly didn’t do that to me. I want to make it clear that the reason I don’t watch incest porn is that I’m better than you. You guys should join me. I may have an idea of how you got here, but I still don’t approve. That should cut deep. It’s like Ozzy Osbourne telling someone they do too many drugs.
The world is more connected than it has ever been. As a result, the boat called planet Earth is getting smaller and smaller. No one feels far away anymore, between jets, the internet, and smartphones. But who are the real denizens of this boat?
We all may be floating on this bitch, but no one knows your name outside of the parents you want so desperately to fuck. The same can’t be said about celebs, though. Celebs are entities we all want to fuck.
A Brand New Age of Naked Celebs
For too long, man had to stare longingly at the likes of Audrey Hepburn and Greta Garbo with no idea how they might look naked. That all ended when cameras were added to cellphones. Suddenly women everywhere could take nude pictures of themselves.
Perhaps back in the day when the cellphone camera was first invented, you could hide your nudes like treasure, but everything is on the cloud these days. You could try to hide your nude pics, but someone will find and release them. This goes doubly so for famous bitches.
One of the best moments of my life was The Fappening. I still remember waking up that morning and hearing the news. Being connected to the porn world as I am, I had heard rumors that there would be a massive release of celebrity nudes, but I didn’t fully believe it. Fortunately, luck would have it that I was very wrong.
For the uninitiated, The Fappening was a massive dump of celeb nudes hackers stole and had the hearts kind enough to distribute. Looking back, I don’t know how I made it so long, not knowing what Kate Upton looked like nude. My life is so much better now.
The Fappening was a massive file dump. There’s enough porn here to keep a man busy for many moons. The only question is, where is the best place to view it. The content has made its way to many places, but they are not alike. One of my favorite places to get my Fappening content is Motherless.
Motherless has tons of great content of every variant, but they did a particularly great job hunting down all the Fappening content they could.
Motherless has been around for a while now and has developed a superb site in that time. The main menu sits up top and has the options Home, Search bar, log in, Sign up, Random image, Videos, Images, Categories, Shouts, Cams, Groups, Galleries, Community, Girls, Chat, Store, and Upload. As you can see, Motherless is a fucking massive porn site. They even have their own store and blog community. These guys are passionate about their porn.
Once you have searched for The Fappening, a filter menu will pop up above the thumbnails with the options All, Videos, Images, Galleries, Boards, Groups, and Filter by. The filter is a drop-down menu that allows you to search by upload date or video duration.
I wasn’t lying when I said Motherless did an excellent job hunting down as much Fappening content as possible. As a result, they have over a thousand videos and almost ten thousand images. That’s one of the largest collections I’ve seen that wasn’t a sketchy torrent.
Because of how much content there is, my favorite videos tend to be compilations, and of those, I find myself returning to the jerk-off challenges over and over again. I’m a competitive guy, so if you put a jerk-off challenge in front of me, I’m going to take it.
Most jerk-off challenge compilations are themed around one celeb. I’ll take you through some of my favorites, starting with Miley Cyrus. Miley has no qualms about showing off her naked body. Not only was she included in The Fappening, but she has also leaked her own nudes beyond that. Her tight little body drives me wild. She might not be able to twerk, but she can sit on my cock anytime she likes.
Similarly, the Natalie Dormer challenge made me launch a nut well before the video ended. I love that resting bitch face she has. It says, “your tiny cock will never please me, but I guess I’ll let you fuck me anyway.” That’s what we call doing the lord’s work, Natalie.
Hosing Down the Cervix
Everybody loves Jennifer Love Hewitt. That’s why love is in her name. I’ve been picturing her naked in my head for as long as I can remember. I’ve put many hours into masturbating to her Fappening content. At this point, we could be considered legally married. Those perky tits and long legs melt my cock into a puddle of baby batter. I would cut a limb off to spray her cervix down with my cum like I’m pressure washing an RV.
Eva Longoria is another universally loved hotty. There’s not much I wouldn’t do to have her whispering dirty talk into my ear while she rides me cowgirl style. If I’m fucking Eva Longoria, I want it to be in a room full of mirrors, so I scan every inch of her nude body. I would remember every second of that encounter until the day I drop dead. Heaven won’t have anything on busting a nut in Eva’s mouth.
The Fappening is one of the best things to ever happen to humanity. I’m not sure where I would be right now without it. Probably out on the streets begging for coins and jerking off to a doll I made out of bottle tops and six-pack rings. Fortunately, I live in a timeline where nude celebs abound.
There are many places to look at Fappening content, but few are as efficient and well designed as Motherless. They did everything they could to hunt down every last drop of content and post it in all its glory. There’s no pixel loss from shitty uploads or photoshopped nudes. This is the real shit right here, ladies and gents.
There’s so much to love about Motherless, but that doesn’t mean that it’s perfect. I love the random image generator in the top right hand of the page. I would love to see that spread so that I can specifically get random images from the Fappening dump. Sometimes you don’t know who you want to see and need an algorithm to assist your selection.
Motherless has one of the best Fappening collections on the internet. If you like nude celebs, you will love Motherless.